Kurt Russel, Action Superstar

To start shit with HMT, here’s 10 Reasons Why Kurt Russell is a better Action Star than Arnold.

  • 10. Firemen are cooler than cops.
  • 9. Ra blows up better than the Predator.
  • 8. Kurt has a killer Elvis act.
  • 7. Wyatt Fucking Earp.
  • 6. Kurt has co-starred with Stallone.
  • 5. Kurt can fake an Austrian accent.
  • 4. Captain Ron was way funnier than Kindergarten Cop.
  • 3. Kurt has never been on the juice.
  • 2. Kurt is not related to the Kennedys.
  • 1. Snake Plisskin could kick John Matrix’s ass every day of the week. Twice on Saturdays.

11 Comments

  1. SayUncle says:

    And don’t forget, he pulls it all off after doing nothing but disney movies.

    And goldie hawn is hotter than any kennedy.

  2. Phelps says:

    Ixnay on the Oldigay, she’s a arvinrgray oonbatmay.

  3. guy in the UNLV Jacket says:

    2 words Jack “Fucking” Burton

  4. Jenn says:

    I concur!

    Fireman are usually hotter too.

  5. Mexigogue says:

    I got mixed up. When you said Kurt Russel I thought you said Russel Crow. That reminded me of Cheryl Crow. And that made me think of Kid Rock. And I was like nuh uh, Kid Rock sucks. Or did I mean Chris Rock? No, you’re right. Chris Rock is way cooler than Arnold.

  6. Peggy says:

    Big Trouble in Little China is the best. Kurt as Pliskin is second best. Soldier is third. Kurt reminds me a little of Sean Connery in that the older he gets the sexier he gets.

  7. HMT says:

    ok asshole.. lets run these down.. btw, I love kurt Russel. but you’ve crossed that line

    10. Collateral Damage – Arnold plays a fireman. no dice
    9. Predator was almost played by JCVD..
    8. Arnold’s fucked all the bitches
    7. sucked – except the moustache. AND Raw FUCKING deal.
    6. Arnold HAS co-starred with Wilt Chamberlain
    5. Arnold can fake a mullet (ala tango and cash)
    4. The bitch in Kindergarten cop was way hotter than Goldie Hawn
    3. Kurt has never won Mr. Olympia as well
    2. Kurt is related to Kate Hudson (who’s married to Chris Robinson of Black Crows. BOOYAH – bonus suck points for that)
    1. Conan gave Snake his ONE good eye.

    there’s just no comparison. and remember, I LOVE kurt russel too.

  8. Phelps says:

    Ok, here is reason Infinity.

    Kurt Russel never played a shit sucking communist Moscow cop.

    And my point on 5 was that there is no way that Arnold can fake an American accent.

  9. All I have to agree with is

    “Wyatt Fucking Earp”

    A fucking Classic!

  10. HMT says:

    Red heat is fucken awesome!

    I like to think he wasn’t communist, but rather just a stone cold Russian mothafucka, devoid of political affiliation.

    yeah, that’s it.

    he kicked ass in that movie!

  11. Phelps says:

    Oh c’mon. He was a hard-corps Commie Soviet Bolshevic and you know it. He was as commie as the guy in Rocky IV.

    Hell, I bet Arnold commied him up, just to make sure that no good Americans got any Ruskie sympathies from his movie. That’s what a Real Republican American would do.