Archive for the ‘Phelps’ Phunny’ Category.

Bear Cavalry

Red beer

I now await the hate mail from lovers of Bud Lite.

Don’t worry, Mikey, Bud Light drinkers can’t read and we won’t tell them.

Safety Fail

Hondurans Pick a Leader

Jules: I don’t wanna hear about no mother-fucking ifs. All I wanna hear from your ass is, “You ain’t got no problems, Jules. I’m on the mother-fucker. Go back in there, chill them niggas out, and wait for the cavalry, which should be coming directly.”

Marsellus: You ain’t got no problems, Jules. I’m on the mother-fucker. Go back in there and chill them niggas out, and wait for The Wolf who should be coming directly.

Jules: You sending the Wolf??

Marsellus: Oh, you feel better, motherfucker?

Jules: Shit, negro, that’s all you had to say.

QotD

It is so tough to be someone’s intellectual superior when he is out-reading you.

Lefties complain that conservatives sell too many books.

Best Inside Joke Ever

House + 80s = Prince George.

I was LMAO the whole time.

Breitbart.tv » Obama: Don’t Tell Me I’m Holding the Mop Wrong

Breitbart.tv » Obama: Don’t Tell Me I’m Holding the Mop Wrong.

“Another way of putting it is when, you know, I’m busy and Nancy’s busy with our mop cleaning up somebody else’s mess — we don’t want somebody sitting back saying, you’re not holding the mop the right way. Why don’t you grab a mop, why don’t you help clean up. You’re not mopping fast enough. That’s a socialist mop. Grab a mop — let’s get to work.”

Hyuck hyuck hyuck.  Problem is, Barry, that’s not really what is going on.

What is going on is that we had a nice wall.  And, having a hammer and nothing to do, you started knocking holes in the wall.  And your opposition comes up, and says, “what the hell are you doing?”

You said, “fixing this wall!”

They said, “all you are doing is knocking holes in it!  Stop!”

You said, “well, how are you going to fix the wall?”

They said, “you can’t fix a wall by knocking holes in it.”

You said, “look, this wall is full of holes, and unless you are going to grab a hammer and do something about it, shut up.”

They said, “the only reason the wall has any holes in it to start with is because you put them there, and you can’t fix a wall with a hammer anyways!”

And then you got a bucket stuck on your head and we were left with a wall full of holes.