Ronnie’s List
Well, we all know I love Ronnie. He’s the first politician that I’ve teared up thinking about after he died. That means that I’m going to honor him the best way I know, but giving you 10 fun facts about Ronnie.
- 10. Secretly hated Bonzo, like any fine American, for being a degenerate heathen monkey.
- 9. Peed on the Berlin wall.
- 8. Once tried to wipe that thing off of Gorbachev’s head.
- 7. Most of the 80’s defecit was from the bills paid to tattoo it back on.
- 6. Had the first Dr. Stangelove style warroom built in the Pentagon. (No, really. That one is true.)
- 5. Thought the Spittin’ Image puppet of him was a Commie clone sent to replace him and had it assassinated.
- 4. Offered to take payment for the weapons to the Contras in tasty, tasty tacos rather than cocaine, but the Contras refused.
- 3. Once tried to a couple of nuclear missiles on Cuba as a goof but was scolded by Nancy for wasting government missiles when he had perfectly good missiles back at the ranch.
- 2. Was first an actor in action movies and then Governer of California, a feat likely to never be dupl… shit.
- 1. He’s getting John Kerry to shut the hell up for a week.
I’m not so sure about # 2, because Ah-nuld was born in Austria. Article 2, Section 1 would have to be Amended, and I doubt that Ah-nuld has that much pull, former Mr. Universe or no…
2. That was good coffee until it went all over the keyboard. Good one.
Just one thing: Kerry’s shutting up for a week, and he’s using Ronnie’s death as the excuse, but I’m agreeing with Limbaugh on this one. The more Kerry keeps his mouth shut, the better his campaign does.
Hey, I remember when that “Spittin’ Image” puppet was gunned down. Wow, that explains a lot.