Dan’s New Adventures

So the blogosphere is all in a big circle, patting each other on the back. We’ve gone straight past the foregone conclusion (to us, at least) that Dan Rather is going to end up “on the beach” and now, I’ve taken it to the next level and decided to predict where Danny-boy is going to be working once he’s been shitcanned from CBS.

What’s that? Did I hear “Photoshops?” Then Photoshops ye shall have!

I thought that maybe Danny would start small. He’s loved over in Britain, if you can belive the Beeb, and who doesn’t believe the Beeb?. Maybe he can sell dresses.


Okay, so that’s far fetched. Of course he would stick to the US, where we know that Dan would never lie to us. Maybe he can get us fit.


Right. Seriously. No one is going to trust him that is a smart, physically fit person. He was loved by the left, not the center. We have to appeal to traditional Democratic values — crude base vulgar depictions of college age girls doing unspeakable acts. That is the Bill Clinton crowd:


But that isn’t my fantasy. I want to see an appearance by MC Diddy Rat. MC Chris could hook him up with some phat rhymes. Some dope beats, if you will. Even if MC Chris wasn’t the one spitting, it could still he major large cool.


That’s all I got. I hope I just beat Allah and Aaron to the punch.

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