The Torture Will Continue Until Morale Improves

My scanner failed me. In the courtroom.

I decreed that it would serve as an example to the others.


This is the carcass after a couple of clips from the SKS, some .45 LC from my brother’s revolver, and a couple of magazines of double-ought buck from the Mossberg Persuader above:


And this is just because I warned my aunt that I was going to put her picture on the Internet:


That should teach her not to drink up all my wine.


  1. R says:

    Take the remains of the scanner to the store you got it from and tell the sales clerk that their plan to kill you by selling you an assassin scanner failed and that next time they should try harder, thanks.

  2. Phelps says:

    Got it at Fry’s. They wouldn’t give a shit.

  3. Mexigogue says:

    I hope you had rap music playing in the background like the scene in office space where they murdered the fax machine with a baseball bat. I should have been there, I could have been Samir.

  4. Phelps says:

    ‘Fraid not. With the group that we had out there, though, if we had music it probably would have been either Credence or MegaDeath.

  5. Phelps says:

    And it wasn’t a fax machine, it was a printer. HP.

  6. Mexigogue says:

    Your aunt has that same look on her face as the chicks who wake up next to me.

  7. HMT says:

    since MegadeAth isn’t a band, I’m sure you meant Megadeth… oh you phelpsie.

    is your aunt taken?

  8. Phelps says:

    Very taken. Her husband is a prison CO, too. On the sort team.

  9. HMT says:

    woah, that’s way metal. between all the guns and living-life-to-the-fullest, I deem it’s best if I just have some tacos and beer with you guys instead..


  10. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    That scanner will never fail you again